just another day in the life of me………….

Ok, I know, I know…..I have been MIA for awhile now…afraid to look at my last post date, because I have been bad.  My eating has been out of control (only gained 1-3lbs; depends on the day LOL).  Then suffered a loss in our family, while the death was inevitable, it was quick and unexpected last week.  Of course this happened during my Spring Break from school so I was less than motivated about anything then of course I ended up with another cold which included a sore throat–I had fear of strep throat–I can never go thru that again!  BUT I have finally recouped and have got my mojo back to get my ass to the gym. 

I started back Wednesday beginning with a pilates class which resulted in the weirdest stomach pain (apparently some type of strained muscle) thought it was my Diverticulitis coming back with an attack–not fun.  BuT after 2 continuous days of aqua aerobics classes, I can happily say they pain is gone, and I have have made a strong schedule of exercise classes on a continuous basis along with a new support team.  Two girls from my math class belong to the same gym so we are faithfully urging each other to show up together for the same classes.  I gave them a copy of my schedule that I plan to keep up and they have agreed to join me.  This includes a straight 5 days of exercise, off on the weekends!  And Tuesdays could include 2-3 classes, depends on my schedule.  These last 10 lbs are haunting me and I refuse to give up.  Especially after seeing Valerie Bertinelli’s picture of  her in her bathing suit on the cover of People–good god woman–how did she do that!  Even if there is some airbrushing done–she still looks great!  I have never been motivated by any celebrity regarding weight loss UNTIL that picture!  So I am determined to do it myself!  My bulging belly is still an irritant to me, so this is my main objective is to get it flatter–FYI, I have NEVER had a flat stomach even as a slender child, it’s in the genes! hehehe

I want to say thanks to Jessica and Nancy for the continuous motivation I receive from them, even when I have disappeared.  I love that they think of me–they are the pillars of this board!

I vow to be better about visiting and posting, but life is crazy with school and only getting crazier BUT I will try to be better esp when I have this support group as well!

So with that said–I HAVE to get this homework done for class tmrw!

tootles!

for 24Hr Fitness today and went to a yoga class this am–wow, loved her class.  Her voice is very soothing and she does a great flow in her routine.  Definitely making her a weekly class, since she only teaches it once a week there but there are other classes, plus my yoga at school on Fridays.  Going to try out their Zumba class-sounds like fun–I might try to make it tonight to the night class and meet up with some girls from my math calss, BUT it’s all contingent on the progress of this damn art project!  So we’ll see if I can get it done before class starts and join them OR I may join them anyways and shine on this project and turn it in late!  really hating this project, but that’d a whole another topic not related to this site LOL

 Well, off to work on a client, then try and finish my project–then the debate on whether to hit the class tonight or not.  IF not, I will definitely be trying it out Thursday morning.

 tootles

when the last 5-10lbs starts to haunt you!  It doesn’t help that I have not been working out as much or the fact that I have been snacking liking crazy especially at night!  BUT I also realized it’s because I have not been working out as much.  So if you have read my dilemma with my crappy aerobics class, which I am still pissed about……you know that I quit SO I haven’t done anything to replace that gap UNTIL today……hubby said it was ok to join 24Hr Fitness as long as I use it–which I plan to.  Have you heard about the fantastic deal that Costco has (ends march 31st, nationwide)???  You can not beat this deal nor can 24Hr Fitness…..you buy a 2 year membership for $299; access to any of the gyms except the Super Sport!  That breaks down to $12.50 a month for 2 years!  SO I will be able to take classes again and not have to worry about school breaks and have any excuses on school holidays. 

I told him and myself that I refuse to gain this weight back!  Plus I am tired of feeling like crap lately because I haven’t working out.  I have a few buddies at school that belong so we have talked about making it a group effort to take classes together.  SO if I can get it in time, I should be able to start back on Tuesday on a regular basis.  Woo hoo!  I am actually excited to start back to classes–how scary is that! hehehe

 Hopefully by starting back to a regular routine again, I will:

1. quit snacking
2. lose those last unwanted pounds
3. get my energy back
4. stay motivated due to seeing the results
5. start getting toned again

Ok, that’s it for now.  Just think if I can get excited about working out (which has been unheard of, just ask my sister! LOL) YOU can too!

you actually see a picture that proves you have lost the weight….I thought I would take some quick pics the other morning before school since hair and makeup was done, even though dressed very casual, that I could use as an update picture.  BUT then I also thought I would find a before picture to see if I could see the difference in my weight because let’s face it, even if the scale says you have lost YOU don’t see it in the mirrow.  Well, that’s how I have felt and I believe I have mentioned this before.

So to my amazement I finally saw what everyone else has been saying–maybe I am done losing my weight!  I have lost a lot more than I realized…..as I said I know in over the last year I have lost about 50lbs all together, BUT I never really could SEE the difference, with the exception that my pants are too big, but I still feel big especially through the tummy section……until I saw the picture!  (it’s my new profile pic! for now)  (P.S. I can’t get the picture to show for some reason sorry! )

So now my goal is to lose another 10 lbs (trying to lose the rest o fmy belly fat) then maintain!  I just want to fit in toa size 10 comfortably!  Then mentally it will be far enough away from size 16 to make me stay disciplined!  That’s the theory anyways LOLOLOL

ok, so I suck at keeping up my blog, exercise journal and food journal obviously since this is the first time I have been on in awhile.  While I haven’t been eating the best, I have been eating in moderation trying to keep within reason, which I have somewhat successfully have done LOL.  BUT I haven’t been eating the best things–you know like the brownies I have been eating every night with a scoop of ice cream.  Since I have been eating this instead of dinner I figure it’s not as bad–yeah right!  what a dumbass I am LOL  It hasn’t helped that I have felt like crap, finally got a cold and it has kicked my butt. 

I did quit the aerobics class, you know the one that was wasting my time~~4 weeks and we had only worked out once.  WHICH has also meant that I have not been working out and I can definitely tell the difference.  I am tired, no energy, and just all together feel like shit!  SO I need to get my butt in gear so I can lose this last 10 lbs already!  As I am chewing on yet another tootise roll :O(  damn Valentine’s candy!

Well, I am starting to feel back to normal somewhat–I plan on cleaning the house tomorrow and hopefully get some yoga in as well.  And starting Tuesday I plan on adding extra days in the weight room t school–well, that’s the plan anyway, let’s see if I actually follow through.  It’s just so hard to get motivated!

Ok, so enough whining and making excuses….Monday starts another week and another day, so the best you can do is start again and not dwell on what I did or didn’t do these last few weeks.

See it, believe it and Achieve it!

yeah, yeah, I have been bad again…..as in not logging in food or exercise even though I have been doing it for the most part. LOL…so after the Mexican food night fiasco I felt like I wasn’t doing very well the next day but in reality I was ok.  I guess I feel like I am not accomplishing much this semester because this damn aerobics class hasn’t gotten into high gear yet!  Good god, let’s workout already…….we spent the class more than half the time going over our heart rates, while that is good to know and everything I am not taking an “activity” class to listen to “lecture,” especially for one lousy credit! 

Today is yet NOT another workout day but a day at the track to prepare for a day of assessment on Thursday provided we have no rain.  How do you prepare to walk the track besides walking the track?????  Seriously this class is starting to piss me off! 

Since we have no yoga class or gym time on Friday, I plan on sneaking over (without my workout buddy :O( ) to the gym today and Thursday to get some time in as well as a workout–sorry, Jess!  I gotta’ do it!

Ok, so off to log my food and exercise for the weekend if I can remember it all.

but I don’t care because it was SO good…..well, at first it was and now I am sorry that I gorged on mexican food for dinner to night!  it was a very long day then a trip to get my colored, then recolored turned into a headache and an empty belly.  Hubby called and I could tell he was hungry so we decided to head out for dinner tonight….only for him to tell me at dinner that he wanted homemade tacos!!!! butthead–he couldn’t tell me that earlier!  he informed me I should always assume that’s what he means when he says he wants tacos!  whatever, a plate full of food, chips, salsa and an ice cold beer later………………I wish I had made him tacos so I could have had a Lean Cuisine and not this belly ache!  One good thing that comes from this—-I won’t do it again for a long time LOL…….ok, so off to pry these jeans off my ass and into fat loose pants hehehe

see it’s not always worth it

BUT now I am thinking that I might add another 5 lbs to my goals so I can really get down to a good weight and then maintain around there.  Now I understand how weight loss can become addictive and an obsession.  It’s amazing when you actually see results and feel good–you think “why the hell didn’t I do this all along????”  It’s not that easy–life happens; stress, daily ups and downs, past life disappoints, current life disappoints, job, family, as well as friends can tend to want to make you eat to escape.

The one disappointing thing I have noticed about my weight loss is, obviously, I am not as young as I use to be and that I never had a flat tummy but even with all the weight I that I have lost I want to lose more because I still have this flab of a tummy which makes me think  I need to lose more otherwise I still look fat to myself.  People keep telling me that I do not need to lose anymore weight but I keep saying “yes, I do– just another 10lbs” BUT what I really am saying is “I need to keep losing until this flab is gone!”  So where does it stop????  Well, my true goal is to go back to a size 10 and be comfortable.  I can’t remember the last time I was in a size 10!  For that matter I can’t remember how much I weighed when I met my husband almost 15 yrs ago……..BUT I now remember that a year ago I was actually at my highest weight of 197 (so I am going to change my start weight to relfect this true weight that I hit) and said I would never allow myself to get over that 200lb mark (which I didn’t–I lost 10lbs)!  BUT then again I said I would never buy a size 16 either–that worked real well!  Have a closet full of 16s! :(   For the last few years I have gone up and down within 15lbs and could never seem to hit any lower than that SO I should be grateful and proud that I have finally overcome that hump and hit a weight I thought I would never see again.

So now I am off to log my food for this am and then head to my aerobics class where I will start a regular exercise routine which will hopefully help with this tummy flab issue–it’s all about the abs workouts–I know that, but I hate them!  BUT I also was told by my last instructor that you can work and build the abs muscles but you still have to lose the fat in front of it! SO in reality I know I still have some lbs to lose but that I also need to start rebuilding those abs!  Maybe one day I might actually see them–yeah, right, never saw them as a teenager and will prboably never see them now but as long as I know I am working them and they hurt–you  know, the good hurt! LOL

Hopefully I motivated some of you that are struggling….it’s a long battle but we have to move forward and work together with the support of this great group to head for our goals whether they are small or large, real or inpractical–we can do it!  I can honestly say that I am living proof that you can do it ONCE you put your mind to it!

Well, tmrw marks the day where I start back to aerboics after a long break, too long actually.  I feel like I will be starting over, BUT shouldn’t be as out of breath being 30lbs lighter!  I havea new instructor, not sure what to expect.  She’s a little too “rah-rah” for me, nothing wrong with it, BUT have a weird feeling about her.  She says it’s all about what you are capable of doing BUT really not believing her–I have a feeling she pushes too far when she shouldn’t BUT we’ll see.  Guess I can’t judge until I see for myself.  Unfortunately this class is full of girlfriends who also are doing it for the soicalization not the exercise–they think it’s an easy A…they picked the wrong teacher.  Actually her expectations for a one credit course is over the top and unrealistic.  I want it for the constant exercise schedule.  I took my diet and fitness class for the other information–this is suppose to be an “activity” class NOT a “lecture” class…….supposedly once she gets started she doesn’t lecture too much but again we’ll see.

As far as eating has been going–I seem to be back on track with the exception of the PMS munchies and sweet tooth now and then.  So I treat myself in small amounts as opposed to sitting and eating ALL of it.   Nothing wrong with that.  If I forbid myself, I only want it more and lots of it! LOL

Ok, not much else to say……will report back after class tmrw. 

BTW, friend of mine gave me some pants to help me through the size transition and not buying pants until I get to my goal…I succesfully wore an 11 all day–woo-hoo toot for me, a good feeling!

after a break during the holidays and in between semesters.  Started yoga again today with a very light workout, but it was friggin’ hot in the room–too much heat on!  definitely sweated when there was no reason too–definitely wearing tank tops from now on.

Also, worked out in the school weight room; starting with 20 mins on the treadmill, completed over a mile then moved onto the machines and did some light reps–started a burn but didn’t want to get carried away so I could move tomorrow. LOL  Now  I need to start working out on weights at home since we have a weight machine in the garage.  Maybe while hubby is at class during the week.  Once the weather gets better, back to walking.  Might try to sneak in a walk here and there at school too.

I start aerobics again on Tuesday, trying out a different teacher but I think she will kick our butts which I need.  Should be interesting–she’s a triathlete and very competitive and thinks everyone should be able to do what she does–she says she doesn’t push you past your limits but we’ll see–have a feeling that isn’t quite the story.  Time will tell.

 Ok, off to make hubby dinner and nuke my Lean Cuisine–what should I have hummmm’ chicken, chicken, or maybe chicken???? hehehe